How do you pray?

There are some things in life that can always make you feel like an amateur. For me, some of these things include bowling, pool, calculus, and sometimes – prayer.

I think that for many of us, our first learnings about prayer came from saying grace before our meals and prayers at bedtime. In most cases, we learned form prayers. Come Lord Jesus, For what we are about to receive, and Now I lay me down to sleep are just a few that are very widely used. Through the use of these rote prayers, we learned appropriate times to pray, and appropriate words. This was a good beginning.

The problem is that, for me at least, any deeper learning I wanted to do about prayer had to come largely from myself. Beyond prayers at church, which always used big fancy words and followed a formula, and the prayers I talked about above, I didn’t really learn about ‘freeform’ prayers in Sunday school or confirmation class.

As I grew, I felt like I really wasn’t very good at praying. And when I began seminary, with the idea that I would go into ministry, I was even more unsure of my abilities. One of my biggest fears was being asked to pray out loud, I was sure I would mess it up and make a fool of myself! Fortunately, being asked to pray out loud is kind of a given throughout seminary training and I became more comfortable with doing so. The trouble was, that even though I was getting better at praying out loud, I still felt like I was woefully uninspired in my own prayers.

My children have a storybook, called “Every Which Way to Pray” and I love reading it to them, because it’s a story of two young hippos (because even hippos and sheep and pelicans pray in storybooks!), who have become intimidated by the idea of prayer because of a manual-like book one of them owns on the subject. As they journey through their town, they encounter several characters who disassemble their preconceived notions of prayer and teach them that you can pray however you desire. Towards the end, the local sergeant (a bear named Sarge) explains to them “Prayer is simple. You talk. You listen. You praise. You thank. You ask advice. You stay in touch with your Maker. Period.” [1]  And then he adds that it comes from your heart.

I think that Sarge has summed it up quite well for us beginners. Because now I have come to understand that prayer is as much being present to God in my life, surroundings, and heart as it is a conversation. Sometimes prayer is holding a person in my heart and inviting God to join with me. Sometimes, I spend a long time in gratitude. Sometimes, when I can’t find the words, I start with ‘help…’ and then sit there. Sometimes breathing is prayer, or singing my heart out at the top of my lungs feeling joy in every note. Sometimes, when the sun shines and I can feel the warmth on my skin, I turn my face to the sky and breathe in the Spirit – how can that not be a kind of prayer?

I now realize that I’m engaged in prayer throughout my day, in many and varied ways. I pay close attention to my thoughts, because if someone is on my mind, I believe they may very well be in need of a prayer, so I pray for them. And I’m trying to teach this to my kids; that while we do the rote prayers at mealtimes and bedtime, we can also pray in a multitude of other ways as well. We might all be amateurs, but we’re learning together.

How do you pray? Are there ways you pray that you might have not considered to be prayer before? Please tell me about your prayers – so I can learn from you and so that I’ll know better how I can pray for you.

Sharing in Christ’s mission with you,

Pastor Joanna+

[1] Meyer, Joyce. Every Which Way to Pray. © Joyce Meyer, 2011.